Thursday, January 7, 2010


i rejoice the day
when i will be found
it's too cold here
to be lost in the woods
to sleep with the deer
in their beds in the snow

i wonder
do you even miss me
do you know i am lost
lost in those lonesome woods
in this world of white
white light and light grays
a stripe of very soft blue in the sky

Really i never was lost in winter wonderland, knowing i could always trace back my tracks in the snow. And i was never unfortunate enough to be caught in a blizzard erasing all my steps.
Alexander on the other hand was lost once in the snow. The girl, he says, asked him to go out-of-bounds.(Yes, you Kayla) I was waiting there at the ski chalet, the mountain already closed. The ski patrol searching for the two of you.
You were found.
I have been lost here in the summer though, in endless willows. But does it count, because i know the land, i am lost in. It is unnerving though. First there is the getting lost. Jane and i are thinking we go in the right direction, thinking we should come out by the river shortly. Somehow we don't, we keep on going, 'knowing' the river should appear. After a long time we do find a river, but is it the one we were looking for? Then there is a while of random search of where the heck we are.
By now we are so deep in the willows that totally block our view, and the ground under our feet is disappearing, turning from swamp to water.
I think that's when we say; STOP. So we stop, consult the map, search our minds for possibilities.
We do find a little raise in the land that gives us a slight view through the trees, enough to get a glimpse of Jo-jo peak (we are lucky). We do have a compass, so now we walk in a straight line towards where we know now the peak is. And surely we find our way again. And even reach our destination(Which was of unparalleled beauty)
I like to add we do get lost again that day, now in the fast fading light...... finding our way in the pitch black.
haha that's yet another story.

Wasn't i going to talk about, being found?
I have no stories about myself being the wild.
I realize, i have always been able to rely on my own resources.
I wonder now, is that good or too bad?

me finding me
how hard can that be?
because here i am
always home
in my own divinity


TechnoBabe said...

You travel through life as well as land prepared. You remember that you had a compass and a map and you knew certain landmarks. You are capable. That's why your adventures are successful.

jozien said...

Thanks technobabe, i start to see what you say.
At the dinner-table here we laugh, the macaroni slightly overcooked. The meals i cook are better, when i feel bad.