Tuesday, November 27, 2012

divine intervention

every year the lake freezes up differently

Last week i had an interesting experience, that makes me wonder about how free will works, if it does, and what is divine intervention.

Ha! i decided (again) to stop smoking last week. And i am now officially a non-smoker. Someone like you who has no desire to smoke, no will power needed, we just do not have the urge.

So yes, i read the book of Allen Carr,
but not till after i decided to sop again.

This is the story:  the morning i stopped was the morning i was planning to go to an after-care meeting from my recent 'changeways' group. I thought  i can speak about it there and they can encourage and support me and help me to set goals and solidify them. The meeting wasn't as good as i expected, i found it kind of lame, everybody was complaining and i was goofy. But anyway i did say what i set out to do and asked the group how i could set it in to manageable goals for the coming week, other than, stop smoking. Afew people said some reasonable things, which i waved down. Then this new girl ( that i didn't like yet, gosh i don't know her) she said get Allen Carr's book. Now we all know how there is a trillion self-help books out there, and what kind of goal is that anyway?  But for some reason i said, oh that sounds good, every time i feel i want to smoke i will read in a book about not smoking. After the meeting i did ask her for the exact title, while actually  having no trust (note last post!) that a particular book could truly help me.

And by golly it did!
The essence of his method is that he makes you understand that smoking does nothing for you. We all will start for a variety of reasons, well none of us really start smoking thinking , oh i like to be a smoker for the rest of my life. Then he says, because the cigarette taste awful we actually believe, that we can never get hooked.
But he goes on, nicotine is very addictive! and what it does, the withdrawal symptoms make you slightly uneasy, give you kind of an empty feeling, 
and that is the only reason you smoke again! to end a feeling created by the nicotine.

The easy way it is called, and easy it is!

Sunday, November 25, 2012


of course i could write a whole chapter on sheep and trust...

I was saying that trust for me is an easy thing, i used to be outright gullible. Then i swung to just trusting that everything a certain person in my life said was a lie.
where am i now? i easily trust, or it just doesn't matter.

I trust that everything here on the Internet is out of my hands, When someone wants to use my photos in whatever way, bless them, i am glad i could inspire you.

I trust people totally,  it doesn't really matter if they lie,  how can i explain that?
When someone tells me they will love me forever, well by their actions of that moment i will know if they love me that very moment or not, and that is all that matters.

we call it, living in the moment, mindfullness :) you know the terms

all we have is the moment.

so when you mean trust, do you mean you are scared if they lie?
I do somtimes find living with my husband precarious ( balancing on a rock like a sheep, but i am sure a sheep doesn't think that way, he trusts himself, the group and the rock)  with my husband i do have to often take a moment, know my self, because he is not to be trusted, i can trust on that.

do not to elaborate?
 or can i trust that you understand why i feel trust is not an issue for me

You know what i was wondering lately, why is TIME so important to me, why do i always want to know what time it is, why do i always feel i run out of time, why am i always on time?

The circle came round, i have a total lack of trust in time..... can you explain that to me.

Jozien xox

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

sheep we are

(picture taken this summer)
are we sheep?
i don't know, what i want to write about, and ran out of time again, i am a sheep as i am always on the run and no place to go.

sooo what i want to write about.
is i observed in myself (and my husband) when one is in total joy, one does not feel discomfort.
Joy might not be the right word,  it's being in the moment also.
It's moments where one is at peace...
I observed it first when i was in my meditation group, which i love, and as i had a bad cold, but went anyway, the whole friggin hour, i had NO cold, my nose didn't sniffle once.

Any i have to run now

rushing will do it for me too :)

while at it that is, like now

let's talk more about after...

love jozien

Saturday, November 17, 2012

road kill

kind of a.... disturbing picture
what word suits it most; sinister, lugubrious?

hardly worth watching

hardly worth watching

Last night was world première
Finding Awesomeland!  Wanna find out what your kids are doing? From the makers of Silly Sundays and the biking videos you’ve grown to know and love brings you their first ever movie – Finding Awesomeland. The title pretty much says it all. Filmed in the motherland of Yukon, they bring you a buffet of  mountain biking, dirt biking, sledding, snowboarding, and skiing. Recommended for people who eat, sleep, and breath. Hold on to your britches, cause Hardly Worth Watching Productions brings you a film…worth watching.

(text copied from mnt.Sima website)

Saturday, November 10, 2012


the time of year, this is probably an immature bald eagle and not a golden eagle. I still don't know hoe to tell them apart
Nevertheless a powerful encounter
my shoulder blades pulling an urge to spread my 20 feet wingspan white wings