Wednesday, January 19, 2011

full moon today

ahhh i took that picture last night, i enhanced the color a bit, is that allowed or is that cheating?
I feel when i tell it's not really cheating. Or is cheating allowed? They are only my own rules.
So, i stopped smoking again today. I started again 6 weeks ago. Again not much, but too much
according to my own idea of what is acceptable or not.
In my marriage it came to a confrontation, different then all the others before, and this morning we are starting over, we are on the same side of the fence, for today. I stopped smoking, he stopped drinking.
I will respond to him from my heart
and not some kind of avoiding answer, because i fear his madness and really my answers/reactions have underlying deviousness because i feel i don't know how to protect myself from his negativity and use revenge in the way i respond slyly.
something like that.
And he will be nicer, not criticizing every move i make.
Ahhhh that is a lot to ask for one day, so beside that i will just vegetate a bit, that works best for me, when trying to change, focus on that and only that. Here the blogging is good; i love it, it's non threatening and cost me little effort and
most of all! you will be behind me! supporting me!


Brian said...

Hey wild Lady ,the full moon with added cheats is cool.The moon will change now into another phase starting small then building back up to full once more.I hope your new phase works for you and your husband.Take care in your wild world :)

Cicero Sings said...

I love the colours in the sky. I don't think it's cheating either .. if you tell. Mostly I just crop or straighten a horizon line.

Hope things remain copasetic.

Elisabeth said...

So many challenges, Jozien. Take one at a time. to me altering the colour is not cheating, it is craftsmanship and making mistakes in relationships is living.

A day at a time.

The Iselin Times said...

I think the color is already there, it's just not always easy to see. It's great to be able to slide the switch a bit so you can see it. I wish it was always just that easy :)

just jane said...

I like this fence post....yes, I see the irony in that. Living with addiction is difficult. That was the issue in my marriage. We separated for two years, while we grew as people. My husband chose me over vodka, but I am always on guard. Even after all these years. I feel for you.