Saturday, December 7, 2013

moon

there is a lonely moon tonight i walk out into the darkness she lays on her back in a hazy halo often i have nothing to do what did you say today i am not one that says i am going to do this or that i guess that could be true i do not take risk like that saying that would mean i really should write some productive story or work on my paintings or clean clean anything imagine if i would say those things i am going to write a story imagine the failure when i wouldn't it is not that i couldn't but really there is something off with my willpower i make a good one for alanon will power is something you leave up to god in that room i did stop smoking remember i smoked for a year or two i stopped with a book by a man named allen he said i don't need willpower so i guess that is why it worked for me i still love the idea of smoking when i see a cigarette i think oh how lovely would that be see my lack is saving me again there is a lonely moon tonight i love the moon most when it is the tiniest sliver we are already past that but it is still nice it is nice outside not too cold here in the north if i went out and there was no sound i waited for a long time for a sound i am in a state of waiting people online sometimes post photos that you can just tell they are from the seventies they are in a state of waiting longer then i am some women do not tell their age for years but i have noticed here online men tend to give themselves 10 years younger 10 years of waiting can you imagine my feet would grow roots no matter how often i curl my toes and paint my nails bright red the lonely moon is threatening to sink into the horizon that lonely moon i was always the same naked woman in the snow but you i remember you from the seventies when you wait that long a conversation can be real animating totally new shall i wait till the next new moon when it's first sliver appears no more moon times what to do now?

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