Radium Hotspring

Yahoo! Just now Alexander phoned,
"mom i can't talk very long....."
But i am radiantly happy. (My pain? what pain)
He and his friend are driving from Whitehorse YT to Creston BC.
Yes, to go into a competition.

here is that screamer

when i hurt i scream
i am not one to suffer in silence
i don't know if that's good or bad
to scream for every little thing
i am not calling wolf or anything
it feels so deep my pain
today it did retreat
residing somewhere in my chest
not in my throat
where i can no more speak
not higher yet
just before the tears start flowing
when they roll across my cheeks
i want to lay there on the floor
and kick and scream
it's not like that today
i didn't even feel it heavy in my chest
when i gave love
and was loved back
abundantly

single delight

I had kind of a rough day today, really of my own creation.
Has anybody ever said to you, about something you love to do, that you do that for solace. well this fairly well known spiritual teacher, that i happened to meet. Told me; how nice that i walk in the woods... for solace.
"Woman! i walk in the woods because i totally love it, it is for me the most glorious thing to do"
Well today i went for 2 walks and did find solace (however you use that treacherous word)
But really in between the two i already was on my way. This is what happened in between. My son (i know he is 19) left Saturday morning on a road trip.(He is not the reason i am sad.) He had NOT phoned yet. So i say to my self; i try his cellphone again (which most often doesn't work, because of being out of range)and when he answers and is healthy and well, i will be the happiest woman alive. Well he is in Grand Prairie. Some 1600km from here happy and healthy.
So now i have my priorities straight again.



First walk i am surrounded by birds in the trees and ducklings on the pond and that screamer the yellowlegs. Second walk: orchids everywhere, fields of labrador, louseworts, tofieldias, potentillas and actually i set of to see if the dogwood is blooming(the big bush that is uncommon here)And yes it is.
But what do i find mostly; Single Delights! my favorite:)flower, honestly. So many of them, i have never seen that many together.
And it tells me something, that i am to be delighted singly. Just me. No one can make me happy or not. We are all on our own in a way, delightfully so.


My head still feels like fluff
from the tears i have been crying
The cottongrass tells me
what ever will be
sometimes you cry
sometimes you feel like walking in stars
that too will disperse in the wind






:) still i really don't know......

caballo caballo

This picture taken, somewhere around 11 pm
Brian, i know i should be talking about the wild places in nature, but my life here in the yard, (really,just a pinpoint in the middle of the wilderness) sometimes turns a little wild.
(When i think of my life here, it's never 'in my house', it is 'in my yard' our house is just one part of that space.)
A while ago, my attention drifted and my profile not totally accurate. I say now; the wilderness can keep it self quite well without me, it has done so for ions of time.
So anyway here a post about my personal(not so much) wild life.
Last night i watched a movie; 'it's complicated' with Meryl Streep, with a movie like that i become a bit wired. So when Don and i go to bed, we have some.... (don't read on if you don't want to know) fairly wild sex :) like galloping horses :) When we lay there exhausted in each others arms, i still manage to say; Don i long for a more exciting life. Of course he is not too happy with this remark, "how wild do you want it?" As in ain't this enough.
As we lay there dreaming away in our own self. We hear "cling clingelingeling"
I try to think which wind chime that possible could be. As often, i do not think outside of the box, only thinking of what i know. Where Don says, "it's the horses!" Then it's i that jumps up, where he stays in bed. Indeed 4 or 5 free range horses are walking through our yard, heading for the garden. Reluctantly i chase them away, because well we can't have them eat the garden, it would take them 5 minutes, but i do like things like this, this is part of the excitement of my life. And really, really, should that not be enough i wonder, well, they should have been stampeding, 20 of them, i riding one of them bareback :)

white roses

white petals fall
i do not want to know about impermanence
straining to see in between the folds
is it there i find
your true heart

climbing rocks

The day starts cold and grey and i end up having to go to town,picking up my car,which is a long story and visiting a dear dear friend in the hospital.
On the way back the sun is shining hot again. I am in a skirt and sandals, no bear spray.
There's rocks to climb.I can't resist, i should have thought of this
I stop along the way at a 'new'(where i've never gone before) spot, Yukon Wild says the sign.I park at the end of the road where there is a no trespassing sign and a danger sing. Oh well i won't go far
Right where i park there are little ponds, more orchids and a duck with a duckling.
But the rocks are calling me.
The rocks are quite different again, then around my house.
I climb up a bit circumvent the vertical once. And do not go to far, because on top of it all no one knows i took this side trip.
:) Just one more place on a long list where i long to go again.

longing to climb a certain rock
longing to have it all a certain way
longing for a better life
longing for i actually don't know what
lucky lucky i can wish this way
lucky lucky i have been there
at least once
so let me long a little longer
yearning to be in your arms again
is it all just lust?

Happy Canada day

powerline
The fireweed is now blooming everywhere. It's the floral emblem of the Yukon

baby grouse

Our official bird is the raven, but i didn't really see much of them today.
Saw a bay grouse though!
And the yard here is full of little Pine Siskins, they have been here for quite a few days, flying in a flock, descending on the gravel around the house, and pecking in the trees. They are quite a joyful bunch. They do do fly into my windows quite a bit, and today i had to rescue two of them who had flown into the porch.

My cats, yessss i have cats, outdoor cats without bells, some birders would not like me. Anyway last night in the wet world, it rained here for a whole night and day, the cats where outside sitting in the wet bushes, i wonder.... cats do not like wet i know that much.... My cats never bring me a bird i do know that much too. Maybe they know me to well, to do a thing like that.

But what do you think, do they like Pine Siskins too? No! not my cats,
Loesje the queen and Bubbelina Georgina, Bubbles for short.
You know i do believe, they don't eat birds. Honestly i do talk to them, and i always feel they listen, well i don't ask much and give a lot.
My cats they can have all the mice they want. (I feed them cat food too)

I keep rattling on today, but that reminds me, i would love to feed the cats, bison meat, is that possible? Does anyone out there cooks for their cats?

Hey and today i went to a Canada Day show, right here in the neighbourhood. Eden and Nora put it on. Thank you girls, it was amazing!

ps. My Bubbles has been sitting behind me on the chair all this time, and i didn't even know, see, she's the best!