more about the river and me

Okay, on this 'winding path' i did find part of my 'old' self back. As lately i wasn't feeling so great, today i feel more like my old self.
Which is, before starting to write, feeling anxious in what to do, shall i paint or shall i write, shall i write this or write about that other idea?

I know this as very much me, and feel good about it. Way better then where i was last month, and had no clue what i wanted to do. Whereas when i was truly what i write about in my profile, that time i was very focused, i wanted to be out there and do my thing and after i would share it on-blog. But this feeling now of being pulled by different passions, it's very good! For me at least.

My profile here on-blog, is no longer accurate for this time in my life, I feel the wild places, can do without me for a while, they manage quite well :) Nevertheless the wilderness surrounding me is still very much part of who i am, don't worry.

Anyway what i really want to say... yes what do i want to say? I keep procrastinating. Because before exposing myself; The snow is still on the trees, no big storm came by and blew it all off. This is going to be a long story :)

Okay i will first talk about my river, see last post. The stretch i drew it from Google Earth, is like the crow flies only 3 km long. Don and i travelled it with the skidoo, from one blue x to the other and back. As we had now way of knowing where we were. After we came back we studied air photos. Where you see the two little ponds, i know of a way across to the meadows. Now the only entry is by the blue x on the right and then there is an entry at the 911-pond, another say 5km. But as you see the 2km we travelled, all the loops and bends, probably more like 8 km.
Really this kind of travel is not goal-oriented. As it is not the shortest route from a to b.

So what does that mean in my life. I was so goal-oriented, now i am..... more in the mendenhall river flow period of my life.

You know i don't get anywhere, in what i wanted to say; Beautiful Taye lake the headwaters of the river, still 20km north of this stretch i drew, and the mouth of the river, where it flows into the Takhini river, 20km to the east. And from beginning to end a very winding river, i would have to write a book, to get there.

the river

take me
take me my love
on your sled
take me down that frozen river
winding is our path
any obstacle
you remove it
you are my strenght
and i'm your heart



the path of my river, the mendenhall.

i keep my fire going

The snow still on the trees
maybe even more heavily
or heavenly?
the birch and willows
bending deeply
the spruce and pine
straightening
arrows pointing to the sky
yet everyday so different
i look forward to tomorrow
how about today?
today i like to skip
i do not like
to be held to ransom
me making decisions
about my life
i don't know
if i can handle
such responsibility

cut wood
stoke the fire

i'm lucky
i have a saw
and glowing embers

boreal chickadee

The concert of falling snow still hasn't taken place.
Only some treetops were cleared of snow by the wind over the weekend.
Yesterday new snow fell and hoarfrost always seems to grow.
Lots of birds song though. On this beautiful day they are very active. My three Ravens keep me company on my ski. They talk and fly in wide circles around me. Like as in.... a maybe as big as a ten kilometre radius. So first i don't think much of it,as they disappear all the time, but as they keep coming back, i realize they are enjoying this magical ski, sunshine, blue skies and ice crystal in the air, with me. When at home they eat from my compost for a while.
The Gray Jays and Magpies are eating my compost all day. A woodpecker drumming in the distance. And some where on my tour i come upon a group of chickadees. Black-capped and Boreals together.
This one a Boreal Chickadee, hanging from the tree, looking for... hibernating insects, insect eggs, cocoons, i actually don't know.



I ski North on my already set trail, comming upon my beachtrail, i decide to turn west. Skiing over animal trails, so i don't sink in too deep. Following this ridge the terrain is flat, that is the nice thing about beaches. The glacial lake that had created it long gone.

skiing uphill

First; Right now there is a reclining moon in the sky, accompanied by a planet.
I say reclining, because the moon is laying back, looking very relaxed. What is that? Does that happen often? Is it me, just seeing it like that for the first time? I search the Internet and my little outdated astronomy book, and cannot find anything. Neither can i find if the star to the left is Jupiter. But That i should know, sooo i say it's Jupiter, correct me if i'm wrong.

Okay now -skiing uphill-. Last week i said to Christopher, i don't swim upstream. Today i find myself skiing uphill, which is not the first time, it is something i often try to accomplish. Probably it is very similar to trying to swim upstream. I like to go with the flow i said.
I suppose to make statements like that, it is nice to know what it really indicates.
Well here is my hill i went up today, see my trail. I actually came down here. I like skiing a lot, but it's not my favorite mode of travelling. It's my limited skill in combination with the places i like to go, that makes skiing hard for me. Today for most of the way i followed my snowshoe trail of two days ago. And yes at the end there is that hill. In no time i got to the bottom of that drumlin, i talked about. This year i decided instead of taking off my skis to side step up and that way making a nice flat trail to come down off. Being on the top, after enjoying the top as i usually do (it was very mild today and sunny!) i decided not to come down that way after all, you might imagine why, and i traversed the hill. At the end, photo, after cutting in the steep side, only able to go horizontal, i had to make this precarious drop.
I did not fall there, breaking trail, one is slowed down greatly by the snow.
I did fall a few times though today, uphill and downhill.
So what can i say about life, my life, no matter if i go uphill/stream or with the flow, there are always challenges, and really i like to take the rocky road, not the path of least resistance.
And... i am using my idiom book now, and what do i find!
I like to take the primrose path! and that's that.
Beside wild roses there are actually blooming primroses on this hill in spring, an Androsace, the Northern-Jasmine.

Oxford Dictionary of English Idioms - the primrose path - the pursuit of pleasure, especially when it is seen to bring disastrous consequences.
The allusion here is to 'the primrose path of dalliance' to which Ophelia refers in Hamlet.

Oh Happy Day

the day before yesterday

last night

this afternoon

This white lace,

has been here for days,

only the colors behind it changing.

With light behind it,

it looks like a black veil.

Days in suspension

This afternoon there was a brief squall
I love the wind!
It was i standing still,
waiting for more.
All that white stuff
falling of the trees in big clumps,
dispersing, blown around

It was just the prelude
to a great concert of flying snow

Maybe tomorrow:)

2 outings

so i cried for a month
lost my passion somehow
suddenly this week i realized
what is so bad about that
that i don't know what i want
there are far worse things for sure
one friend said,
you became softer Jozien
i guess a nice compliment
another friend
talked about

being driven to rejoice

well whatever happened

This morning

i could not stay inside

okay that's what i call driven

my passion you know

who knows, maybe it's back

i put on the snowshoes

while the light was hazy

soft pink

when you follow this photo

my house in the middle

behind the dark spruce

i went through the forest

on my dream path

crossed little lake

the bog was fantastic

and then blue china swamp

up little drumlins

and here i am

on the ridge

sitting in snowsecond outing

skidoing with Don
this morning straight North
Don takes me straight South
we run into the elk herd
the snow very soft
following trails
where i have never been
me drawn to Jo-jo
recognize now where i am
and start pointing the way
but my man has
a mind of his own
and goes on yet another trail
lo and behold
we come upon
a
big bull moose!

after visiting a while

we return

the sun comes out fully

the sky many different kinds of blue

clouds in all shades

from white to dark purple

the tree tops lit up

hmmmm where are we now?

i just point my finger

Don follows this time

first i am not so sure

if i recognize anything

soon i see my blue ribbon

and when we get home

the light is soft peach

turning bright pink

i know

i live in a dream:)